Motherhood

The Children Will Not Shrink

As a mother, I feel I take up too much space. We are too loud; we are unruly; we are not welcome in this place. Any place. A public space. A space created for old and young a like, and neither you nor I decide who is in and who is out. But I feel… Continue reading The Children Will Not Shrink

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Motherhood

Part Two: Hellos and Goodbyes (birth story)

I hate being pregnant. It’s not about glowing and being some lovely, maternal goddess. It’s uncomfortable. It’s exhausting. It’s counting down the endless number of days until you get to meet the little person. Which I was positive was never, ever, ever going to happen. We hit all the milestones: thirty weeks; thirty-five weeks; a… Continue reading Part Two: Hellos and Goodbyes (birth story)

Motherhood

Part One: Discovering Pudding (birth story)

Something wasn’t right. We had just returned from our annual weekend away in Melbourne: two glorious child-free nights spent drinking and dining around the city. Yet instead of feeling relaxed and refreshed, I was depressed. I spent the entire night sobbing on the lounge room floor for no apparent reason. Everything felt overwhelmingly dark and… Continue reading Part One: Discovering Pudding (birth story)

Motherhood

The Worst Advice for New Parents

When you have children, everyone is suddenly your best friend and guidance counsellor. They know everything there is to know about babies and you ought to know, too. I understand that most have the best intentions and are genuinely nice people. But could everyone just stop, please?! Here's my list of some generic parenting advice that… Continue reading The Worst Advice for New Parents

Motherhood

Raw Motherhood: peering through the cracks of a sometimes-together mama.

"I don't know how you do it." A lovely older woman said this to me in a waiting room on Friday. I was holding the baby, keeping an eye on a toddler and pleading with the pre-schooler to return back to me, while the school kid read a book in the corner. "I don't know… Continue reading Raw Motherhood: peering through the cracks of a sometimes-together mama.

Motherhood

Being Mama to Four: My First Week of Parenting Too Many Children.

It's been a week since we welcomed little 'Fred into the world, and it has been ... intense. In other words: "flipping insane; really who thought four small people (including three under-four) would be a good idea?!" We did. Suckers. I've found myself reduced to being nothing but a walking life support machine; the sole purpose of… Continue reading Being Mama to Four: My First Week of Parenting Too Many Children.

Motherhood

Stuff My Kid Says (why I’m a little crazy)

I'm just going to say it outright: children are ridiculous. The things that come out of those tiny mouths make no sense what-so-ever. Sometimes it's hilarious. Other times it is incredibly painful, and you suddenly realise what it is that has made you slowly lose your mind (i.e. years of nonsensical waffling).  But sometimes it's hilarious.… Continue reading Stuff My Kid Says (why I’m a little crazy)

Motherhood

The Sounds of Summer (Two More Sleeps ’til School Returns)

I'm hungry. What are we doing today? He touched me. She looked at me. NO! STOP IT! GET OUT! MUUUUUUUM! I'm hungry. What can I eat now? (you're literally eating right now) Yeah, but what can I have? Mindless shrieking. I DON'T WANT TO (insert perfectly reasonable request here)!!! THAT'S NOT FAIR!! UGH! I have… Continue reading The Sounds of Summer (Two More Sleeps ’til School Returns)